I haven't flipped through Vogue magazine since about 1982, so I missed this page in the November issue. Fortunately, it was brought to my attention by the Proven Winners PR folks, via the e-mail newsletter of Chris Beytes, editor of trade magazine Grower Talks. Because what gardener isn't eager for some fashion advice?I like the gauntlet gloves--useful to avoid forearm scratches when pruning, although she doesn't seem to be pruning anything. Those might not be the best shoes for double-digging, though, and I'm a little worried about her toes if she drops her trowel. At least she doesn't have to worry about compacting the soil by walking on it; those spike heels might even aerate it a little.
The Proven Winners folks are wroth that although the designers got credit for the stilettoes and the pencil skirt, the growers didn't get credit for the celosia and the petunias. It seems a great injustice. Why don't they redress it by doing another garden fashion spread, and hiring me as stylist? I'll show them some garden clothes you could actually plant annuals in. (And I could inform this poor waif that November is not the time to plant celosia in New York City.)
Personally, my gardening apparel tends more toward grunge than glitz. I guess that means I'm a couple of decades out of fashion.
My gardening shoes are a miscellaneous collection of mud-impregnated old sneakers. My gardening tops are T-shirts that have been demoted from my grocery-shopping wardrobe for stains or rips (I mark them with a black "X" in Sharpie so I won't accidentally wear them outside the garden and frighten people at the supermarket). My gardening bottoms are venerable grandma jeans with an elastic waist for bending over and plenty of pockets to lose plant tags in. I always wear gloves, which get washed about once a year, though I rarely remember to wear any of my many hats.
Vogue probably wouldn't hire me to style a spread any more than they'd hire me to model. But at least I know what to do with a petunia.
Got a garden question? I recommend you call or e-mail the Plant Clinic of The Morton Arboretum in Lisle, the Master Gardeners of the University of Illinois Extension or the Plant Information Service of the Chicago Botanic Garden in Glencoe .
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